It's time to emo again..:P. Recently made a lot of mistakes which caused other people to actually stumble. That's the thing about leaders, every move and everything that they do actually affects others around them. Perhaps that's why I'm not like a great leader yet but just someone learning to be one. It's funny. You try your best, but you still fall and make all sorts of mistakes. It hurts both me, and the other parties involved. Don't worry, this post is not about some particular thing that happened but as God is humbling me, I start to see more mistakes. More weaknesses. More noobishness. I came to a conclusion after seeing all this. I'm not a good leader. If I am good, will all these happen? Will not GMC grow and flourish? Sometimes I really wonder, why God chose me? Sometimes I even think, whether is it really God who chose me or not.
For those youth from GMC who are reading this, don't be surprised. Leaders have this struggle. We are chosen by God to help you guys grow. The problem is, we are still human. And we make mistakes, plenty of them. We are sort of the center of attention to the devil. The devil knows how to 'strike the leader, take out the army'. That's why we struggle still. This is more of an emo post but there is something to learn from here as well. We can't run away from making mistakes.
If we really are honest with ourselves, we will see that we sin terribly and bountifully everyday. I am starting to see that more. Actually, we're not even better than a serial rapist or a mass murderer. In the bible Jesus said that if we look at a woman lustfully, we have commited adultery and if we are angry at our brother, we fall on the same judgement and murdering. How many times we actually had lustful thoughts or was angry at someone? Even for a short period of time? Plenty, countless, almost everyday. That's why, we are like serial rapists or mass murderers. So what does mass murderers and serial rapists got to do to be saved? To improve? To change? Believe in Jesus.
You know, we don't really like to see our own faults because it makes us vulnarable, it shows that we are not good and it means we have to leave our comfort zone and put effort to change. That's why we try to hide our weaknesses and every chance we have we will try to say something or do something to cover our mistakes so that no one knows about it. I'm guilty of course.
When it comes to mistakes, Jesus likes a humble and contrite heart. A humble heart is a heart that admits his/her mistakes and a contrite heart is a heart that feels sorry and repents of his/her mistakes. Since we can't run away from making mistakes, why hide? Just admit it to God or someone close to you that can be trusted (must be a Christian). When we do that more often, God will change us and forgive us. That's a promise He made. 100% true.
About me being a good leader or not, only God can answer that question. But one thing I know for sure. I can't do it without Him. I'm might not be a good leader but He is good. If GMC grows, it will be because of Him. I only did my part, that small 1%. Holy Spirit, do your work. We need You. If You don't do anything, we won't be able to grow. Help us please. I still believe God chose me though, for whatever reason He has for doing so. Help me improve. Amen
Anyway...not emo di...coz I know that God is with me...Just wanted to share this thought...ciaoz.
One problem though, I need to go to work the next day. I kept telling God, "Hey God, can tell me next time? Or some other day please? You know very well that I need to go to work tomorrow. So please help me sleep." Of course, I still couldn't sleep, if I did, then I got nothing to blog about :P.. Then suddenly I heard God saying, "Go to McDonald's, take your laptop and go." Now I'm pretty sure that it's not my stomach speaking because I wasn't hungry that time (hard to believe nonetheless). So I thought that since I couldn't sleep, I might as well do my work in McDonald's (by the way, I tossed and turned until it was 4 a.m. that time).
So I grabbed my laptop and drove to McDonald's. There were only two 24-hour drive thru McDonald's in Ipoh. So I went to the one in Bercham first. When I reached there, I noticed that there were no cars and the entrance to the parking was blocked. However, the building was brightly lit. So I parked somewhere, and went down. I saw a notice on the door which wrote, "Sorry we are closed for our monthly cleaning." (not exact but you get the idea).
So since this one was closed, I went to the other McDonald's which was in Gunung Rapat. To my horror, it was also closed for monthly cleaning. The first thing that came to my mind was this: "How can McDonald's be so dumb?!? Why do they choose the same day to do their monthly cleaning? I mean, they should have closed one for cleaning and open the other one instead of closing both!!! This is ridiculous!!!" (I was pretty cranky because I was REALLY sleepy).
And then another thing came to my mind. Why did God ask me to come out in the first place? I'm sure He knows that both McDonald's were closed that time. Basicly, the real question in my heart was, "WHY DID HE WATSE MY TIME?" Then I thought to myself, maybe I heard God's voice wrongly. Maybe it's some other place that I can do my work in. Sadly, there was none. Mamak's are open 24 hours, but my laptop cant last that long because it's battery life is really sohrt. I was seriously mad at God at that time.
Then God started to say something to me. When God asks us to do something, we don't need a reason. The reason is for God to know and for us to find out. We will never be able to see at that particular time, why God ask us to do certain things. Some things that God asks us to do can really seem ridiculous. Not because it really is ridiculous. But because we are not as smart as God. He knows the future. He knows what's best for us. To us it seems ridiculous, but to Him, He knows it's purpose. So the question is, do we have the faith to just obey Him? Obeying Him can be tough. Obeying Him could mean the end of some of your wants, it might cause people to laugh at you, it might make you confused and the worse of all, obeying God can cost you your life.
What I experienced is something really small and somewhat insignificant. But there is a lesson to be learnt from this experience. God challenged me to how much I am willing to obey Him even though some of those things that God told me to do might seem ridiculous. I pray for you and I, that God will help us fall in love with Him so much that we will be willing to obey, and continue to obey His voice, His word, His calling, His purpose.
There is a final twist in this story. I was able to find out the purpose of me obeying His voice to go out to McDonald's. He told me, "Write what you learned today in your blog". Amen
So just wanna encourage you. God's ways may seem strange and difficult to follow. But there is always a reason to why God wants you to follow Him. He has something special for you at the end of it. Just trust and obey.
wow...looks like it's been a while since i've posted anything...totally busy with camp stuff and after the camp i had to reoraganise some stuff...be ready for new posts!! I guess this blog has it's purpose...some of my friends are leaving already for futher studies...i guess this blog is like some "preaching" that they can "hear"...haha...i hope and pray that it will be a blessing...ciaoz
sorry guys for not posting for almost a month now...I have a post in mind but dont have the time to type it out yet because i'm busy with organising a camp for my church youth. Details of the camp are as follow:-
Venue: Tapah SUFES Campsite, Malaysia
Date: 7th to 10th June
Price: RM50
This camp promises nice outdoor adventures including a outdoor in the woods style BBQ on the last night. Plus you get to meet friends as well.
Anyone that is interested please drop me a comment with your contact number and name. (dont worry i wont approve your comment so that your contact number is safe with me) and after that i will contact you. Will blog soon after the camp. Ciaoz
I really dont understand....why people treat God like santa claus? It hurts my heart when people ask me..'why God doesn't answer my prayers?'. Nowadays, our view of God is like He HAS to listen to our prayers like that....after all He did promise that when we ask anything in His name, He will give it to us right? (John 14:14).
In my life, I have always prayed in this manner, "Lord, I really desire this to happen, but if it's not your will, please don't do it. Let your will be done Lord." I thank my church leaders for teaching me this way of praying. In this way, I ask God for something that I really want but I still yield to His will at the end, which is far better than what I can ask for.
Sigh....Some people don't get it....God doesn't answer your prayers because HE IS GOOD. God is someone who doesn't change. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He has certain characteristics that doesn't change and that's what makes Him God. He doesn't change according to His mood. He is true to His Word.
"If He is true to His Word, then why doesn't God answer my prayer like what He promised?", you may ask. Whilst He promised that He will answer our prayers, He doesn't answer it if it's clashing with His nature.
I'll give an analogy. A good dad tells his 6 year old son, "Hey son, I'll be there for you whenever you need any help ok? Because I love you." So the son goes like, "OK!" (I mean any son would be happy to hear that). So of course the son remembered what his dad told him and suddenly there was something that he needed help with. So he asks dad with some tears coming out of his eyes, "Dad, help me up please, I wanna play with the knife like how mommy does. Looks like fun!! Daddy please?!?!???Can I??!?? Please?!?!?????"
Well, I guess and hope that there are not any cruel father's out there that will let their young son/daughter play with a real knife. Sometimes we really ask God for something like how that kid asks his father in the analogy. We always think that a certain thing is good for us or we always had something that we always wanted and asked God for it. You know what's the worse part? We complain when God doesn't grant us that prayer.
Imagine that in the same analogy, the kid starts to say things like "Dad!! You told me that you'll be there for me whenever i needed help. But why when I asked you, you didnt keep your promise. WHY?!?!!!?!!???" Can you imagine how the father would have felt. He only did it because he loved his son and all his son did was complain and in a way called him a liar.
Sigh... All God did was care for us and we get mad at Him. I used a 6 year old son to represent us because in comparison to God, our knowledge of what is good or bad or anything else is far superior. In fact we are like 1 year old babies or younger. Can you see now how much God loves us? He loves us so much not to answer some of our prayers because He knows that answering some of them is either bad for you or it's bad for you at that time. The problem with us is that instead of feeling that God loves us by doing that, we feel that He doesn't love us.
Actually, I am one of those people. As humans sometimes or most of the time it's really hard to see how certain prayers unanswered can be a good thing. But by faith, I know that HE is GOOD and I choose to trust that He always does things that are good for me no matter how it seems.
Here are some promises for us to remember when we have unanswered prayers or when we feel that God doesn't care or love us.
Romans 8:38-39
38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
With this few verses, I hope that it will encourage you to continue to pray and ask God for stuff but always yield to what He wants because Daddy knows best. God loves you all. If He gave his only prized possession (Jesus) will He not give you things which are good for you? I'll end with this passage of scripture
Matthew 7:9-11
9"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!
God Bless...
In this post, I just want to say sorry to God. I started this blog for the reason of encouraging others and writing some of the thoughts that God put in me. However I totally forgot one thing. In my first serious post entitled 'Thinking D.E.E.P.', the first acronym stands for depend.
I realized that recently it's so hard to post anything because I did not depend on Him. I used my brain to think of the things I wanna write but nothing comes out. If I want to make a difference in the world either in using this blog or other means, I need to depend on Him. People who wrote the Bible all wrote through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit. In 2 Peter 1:21 writes, "For prophecy never had its origin in the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit." That's what made the bible so powerful, the inspiration of the Holy Spirit.
So from now on, I will not post anything unless prompted by the Holy Spirit.This doesn't mean that I will be posting less. It just means that I will post topics which the Holy Spirit tells me to post. For instance, the series on purpose was more of my own idea. God told me to write some other stuff but I thought of finishing the series first. I guess now the series will have to wait. For those who are anxious for some guidance on how to know God's will in your life, I guess you'll have to wait. Sorry about that. But I know that God has His timing of doing things. And I want to follow His plan.
Sorry Lord! May You continue to speak to people through this blog using Your way not mine. Amen.
Some people might ask this question, "Why do I need to know my purpose? I just live my life as it comes. I don't want to think much about it. The more I think about it, the more frustrated I become." I can assure you that it may be frustrating at first when you don't know your purpose, but when you find it, there will be a sense of liberation within you. You will finally know that you are not wasting your time.
Here are some of the benefits of knowing your purpose:
Knowing your purpose gives meaning to life
Here's a scary statistic for you guys to think about. In 2008, over 30,000 people committed suicide n the US. Which means that in every 16 minutes, someone commits suicide. Let's ponder on that for a moment. Everyone dies at one point in their life. Some die early, and some later. But why should we continue living? Since there is so much pain and suffering and if there is no meaning to life, we might as well end our life now. Have you been told to do something and you didn't know the meaning or the purpose of doing it? I remember my friend once told me during the exam period of Form 5, "Why do I need to study Additional Maths? It' not like I'm gonna use it or apply it in my life anyway!" However, my friend did try his best to practice doing his Add Maths, but he dreaded it for 2 years. In this scenario, my friend only needed to suffer for two years, but life lasts a lifetime. Not knowing your purpose in your a lifetime will result in a life of suffering without a purpose. Which makes life pretty much meaningless.
Knowing your purpose simplifies your life
Especially nowadays, life is much more complicated. In a research that I read about recently, by the time we are 25 years old, we would have made over 80% of the decisions that would form the course of our entire life. Wow...Complicated huh? (for those older than 25 don't worry...haha!! I always believe God allows u-turns). Knowing your purpose in life would simplify your life in a sense you know what you will do or become in the future. For example, If I know at the age of 15 that I am suppose to be an astronaut, I wouldn't have to make difficult decisions on whether I want to apply for going into engineering, marketing, or any other course that does not help me be an astronaut. I would just take an astronaut's course (sorry la..don't know what it's called). That makes life easier and simpler.
Knowing your purpose focuses your life
Being focused in what we do is an important thing. As human beings we all know that our time on earth is limited. We actually do not have time to do everything under the sun. Rather than doing everything, it is wiser to choose which to focus on and master it. Jesus Himself was very focused in His life. He knew what His purpose was and He did plainly what He was meant to do. No time wasting, just a very purposeful life according to God's purpose. Because of that, by the age of 33, He made a long lasting impact in the world. We need to know our purpose too so that we can focus and be more effective in whatever we do
Knowing your purpose motivates your life
Whenever somebody knows the purpose of what their doing (especially if it is a good purpose), the person is motivated to do the task, whether or not he/she likes the task. Let me give you an example. Jesus had temptations to give up on going up to the cross because He knows very well that He is going to suffer terribly. But He yielded to God's purpose for Him and went up the cross. Even in our life, sometimes there are certain things we don't want to do because it's hard to do. But when we know our purpose, we will be motivated to do it because we know that somehow there will be a positive outcome. As for myself, I know my purpose and I like doing what I'm doing now. But there are times when I struggle with fulfilling my purpose in life. But I know that one day, all these will be worthwhile.
Thanks for reading, I hope you will be motivated to know your purpose in life after reading this post. I guess the next question is, "How am I supposed to find out what my purpose in life is?". The next few posts will give you some guidance on how to know God's will for your life. And please pray for me that whatever I write here in this blog will continue to glorify Him and encourage other people. God bless.